CM: Cheating-A Woman's Perpective I



Sensitive subject, cheating. Sensitive and deep.
Not too long ago, I was 17 and in the university. Life was great. My major worries those days were mostly money and time to study and those were not even major, if u get my drift. I loved to make friends. Partying was my fav pastime cos it afforded me the opportunity of making new friends, 80% of them boys. Oh yes, the boys! I loved the meetings, I loved the attention, I loved the butterflies-in-tummy moments, I loved the flirting….but most of all, i loved the thrill of the chase. I could never commit. I was so sure I would be a cheating partner in whatever relationship I eventually “settle” for. Then, I met him….
….and my theory of One Man Wouldn't Do died a natural death.
Lots of women can identify with this. You meet your soul mate; the one person that understands you to the core; the one person your whole world revolves round; the one that makes your heart skip a beat whenever you hear his voice; let’s admit it, the one person that holds the key to happiness as you know it. Suddenly, life aint worth living without him and y’all decide you wannna spend the rest of your lives together.
Now, you are married. First coupla years, the fun is unbelievable. You wonder how you got so lucky… you married the perfect man. He never forgets your birthday or your parents’, for that matter; he calls you up at odds hours just to say how much he loves you and misses you (forget that you just kissed him goodbye some minutes back); plies you with endless gifts and chocies at any and every opportunity; leaves little love notes at every nook and cranny of the house. Heck, every night IS a date night and the SEX……oh, the sex IS mind-boggling. You are so in love.
Then, come the children and with them, a whole lotta responsibilities.
He becomes a driven man. The sex is still mind-boggling but sometimes it lacks the romance and finesse that made you feel really special in his arms. Birthdays get forgotten every once in a while; the love notes disappear entirely; the phone calls....hmmm, the phone calls still come but just so he can find out whats for dinner or to say he’ll be late coming home! Cant say I blame him…cost of living is way too high especially with present day economic standstill and HE HAS TO PROVIDE FOR HIS FAMILY!
Overnight, you become mother (with the extra inches on the waistline as testimonial), slave, housekeeper, slave, maid, slave, career woman, slave, lesson teacher (someone have to take the kids through their homework for pete’s sake), slave, cook, slave….very well over-utilized and under-appreciated! End of the day, you cant wait to crawl into bed and sleeeeeeeeeep! No time to fix up yourself…...mani-pedis get done in your dreams and even then, you never get to finish cos the little one is yelling you awake. Phew!
With the passage of time, the romance dwindles to almost non-existent. You would wish for the intimacy of the yester-years. And this, darlings, is the CRUX of the matter! Expected as it is, what would cause a woman to step out on her marriage.... step out on her man??!
......To Be Continued

10 comments:

NJK said...

oooohhh why did u stop there come on!!!! thats not fair.

njk said...

even when "HE" drives u crazy/mad u still love him more. Why??????????? cant seem to understand that theory

Hazel said...

My point exactly, Njk. Even when the drive us made, we still love them. Its just too difficult to move on to the next man!! Too much history there!

Hazel said...

My point exactly, Njk. Even when they drive us mad, we still got nothing but love for them. Its just too difficult to move on to the next man!! Too much history there!

Anonymous said...

I just discovered ur blog, I have read alot of blogs and I must say urs is the best blog I have ever read. Woh!!!! I luv ur flow and writing style. I am so impressed and I must say u are a very intelligent person. Ur are indeed a superwoman and mum. Well done girl!!!! ur husnband is a lucky man (i know him by the way LOL!!!)

Hazel said...

Thank you soooo much, Anon! Wooosaaaaa...thats all i can say right now. Thanx for visiting my blog!

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

I don`t think any woman sets out to cheat.Not consciously anyway.But i may be wrong.In most cases,it`s starts out as someone to talk to.Cos once the children arrive,you both work,the sex is still good but it`s mostly missionary and you`ve got to be quiet so as not to wake the little darlings.You long for the days of raw passion,when you could orgasm so loudly that your throat hurt,long for someone to look at you again like they wanna tear ur clothes off,even though ypu know that the waist is a few inches wider and the once pert boobs have given in to gravity and endless breastfeeding.And all it takes is a tender look from even the most unlikely person,who atually listens to u AND still looks at you as if he wants to tear your clothes off....and hey presto...before you know it,u are in a full blown affair..Aaaand....Breathe...(lovely story by the way)....

Anonymous said...

*you* *actually*corretions to errors in prevous comment.

Chuwechuwe said...

@ NjK

Gen 3:16 To the woman he said,


“I will make your pains in childbearing very severe;
with painful labor you will give birth to children.
Your desire will be for your husband,
and he will rule over you.”